Confused state of mind......

This is my brother Kaustav. I am missing him so much today.........
You know i was just thinking, what do i name my life??? I mean whatever has happened to me from the day that i came to this world?I don't know if i am sad or happy at this moment.Have i lost myself??? or have i just found myself?????
   I don't even know why am i getting such a feeling right now. There are just so many questions arising in my mind right now.If anyone reads all these, will that person understand the intensity of all the feelings that i am feeling???
I want to be hugged. I seriously need one now........
 And what is supposed to be more important for a person: family, career, friendship or love? Now this is indeed a very difficult question. And why do peoples' minds change with time? And does time really heals? and is there really any future???? I mean it's just that we are passing a day and a night, and then we pair these two up and call it an entire day, then when we cross one of these, we call it yesterday and now that i am writing this, it is the present and tomorrow that everyone says no one knows, what is this tomorrow????
And what if someone knew what tomorrow will be like?? Only matter of "if"s are arousing in my mind right now.Then what is the reality??WHOM am i suppose to believe and trust?

   And I don't know why my eyes are full of tears.........